I read somewhere recently (forgive me, like I said, forgetful...) that at the ripe old age of three, children begin to develop fears about the world around them. They realize that sometimes shadows in the dark are more than shadows. Their imaginations create scary scenarios in their heads filled with dragons and monsters and the like. They also have the capacity to realize their own mortality, usually after watching a film, reading a story, talking with friends, or the death of a family member, friend, or pet. That's a huge thing to deal with in such a new little mind. I wish that they didn't lose their innocent feelings of immortality as children. Not saying they should think they are invincible and jump off of the slide at the park, but I just wish that they could stay in the little safety bubble a while longer without becoming engrossed in fears and worries about their lives and the world around them.
I should cut to the chase - I've been super emotional about Sprout turning three. So much so, in fact, that I have put off writing her birthday letter until now because every time I thought about it, I started to cry. But, nonetheless, even though I am emotional about it (and so is she...like a teenager), here it is.
My dearest, beautiful, big girl,
You take my breath away every day in so many amazing ways: you make me laugh so hard it hurts, you make me hold my breath and count to ten (yes, that's when I'm mad), you make me sit with my jaw on the floor while I am constantly blown away by your comprehension, vocabulary, and intelligence (you've been reading words lately of your own accord - mind-boggling).
I could sit and list all of the things you have done that I am proud of you for in the last year, but I would be here forever. The big highlights have been watching you grow in your love of dance, observing as you have become the most wonderful and loving big sister a little brother could ask for, and listening to your imagination grow and grow. My favourite story you made up recently went a little like this: "Once upon a time, in a faraway land, there lived a baby unicorn who was super beautiful and had a magic unicorn horn. Her name was Cass, just like you! She lived in a big beautiful castle with her Mommy unicorn, and they played every day and loved each other forever and always, just like me and you." I had to write it down, because it made my heart so incredibly happy.
I could never have dreamed of a better daughter. You are perfect in every way, and I hope that I am doing a good enough job raising you. Sometimes, I feel guilty having been given someone so special and such a big responsibility in helping you grow up right. Please forgive my tired days and my grouchy days. I try not to let those emotions run into our time together, but I know they inevitably do - you are amazingly perceptive for a 3 year-old, and you always know if I am a little off (which you almost always try to cure with a hug and a kiss). Please know that you are so important to me, and that you have the sweetest and most caring heart.
I love you so much, Sprout, and I hope that you have a fantastic year being three! I can't wait to see what adventures God will throw our way in the next 11.5 months! Sweet dreams, baby girl.
xoxoxo
Mommy
