What do YOU do during naptime?

The time has come!! It's an extremely exciting day for Mommy & Sprout!! After much deliberation and consulting with my most fabulous older sister about the deletion of the dreaded morning nap, today was the day to start cutting it out! Let me share how my incredible experience has gone thus far (and it's already 1:00pm!)...

'N' is for NO NAP!

I have conversed with a bazillion other moms about when, where, why, and most importantly, HOW, to cut out the morning nap. I got a flurry of differing opinions and advice: "Let them decide when it's time to cut it out...", "Start waking them up sooner and sooner until they don't need a nap anymore...", "Push back the start time of the nap and wake them up when it's time to eat lunch...", and so on and so forth. Unfortunately, all of these seemed like horrible options for Sprout, who really just got crabby around 10-10:30 ish and appeared to desperately cling to that nap. Then I consulted with my sister, A, who is a dayhome QUEEN and mother of her own to two gorgeous kidlets. Her advice was the only advice that made sense to me.

"Have a strict rest-time established where the child lays down on the couch (with or without you) with a drink (milk, formula, whatever - in a cup) and watches a show for a half hour or so, just to re-charge. Then have lunch about an hour later and put them down for their nap shortly thereafter."

Wow. Why didn't I think of that!? So here's how today's schedule went (so far):

8:00am - Wake up!

8:15am - Breakfast

10:30am - Rest time with 4oz of formula in a cup. Sprout laid on the couch with me under a blanket and snuggled while watching 40 minutes of 'Finding Nemo'. Awesome! I got to cuddle her without rocking her to sleep and disrupting her sleep schedule!

11:45am - Lunch (which Sprout promptly laid her head down on her tray afterwards and said 'bye bye', which translates to 'night night' when she's tired)

12:00pm - NAPTIME!!!

Like I said, it's now well after 1:00pm and she is still sleeping!! We've also just been putting her straight to bed - no cuddle, no rocking, nothing - and she has been going to sleep like a champ on her own. She whimpered a little for the first day, and now it's day 4 and she doesn't even care! She snuggles her Monster, cuddles into her blankets, and goes to sleep after about 10 minutes. It is absolutely incredible!

Part of me still feels guilty and wants to rock her to sleep and keep giving her a bottle. It's so hard to let go of that with your first baby. Especially now being pregnant, I know I'm not going to be able to snuggle her the same way for long, and that she's going to have to be the big sister about 5 months from now...I was definitely trying to hold onto the 'baby phase'. I guess what she is telling me today is that she is indeed moving into 'toddler' mode, and she is completely fine with it. Sigh. I love my Sprout. And my Seedling. It makes me so excited to have another tiny one to snuggle for another year!

Anyways, there's my advice for you to follow for how to delete the morning nap and bottle. If you're lucky like me and have an easygoing child, it might just fall into place like it seems to have for us! Now to work on the soother...

Love you so much, Sprout! You're such a big girl, Mommy is so proud of you! Keep up the good work...Santa is watching :)

xoxoxo

Mommy

Multipara.

Anyone know what the title of this blog means? I learned a whole multitude of medical terminology pertaining to pregnancy during my massage training - especially when I did further education to specialize in pre and post natal massage. Multipara means a woman who has had multiple pregnancies. Any guesses what today's blog is about?

'M' is for Miscarriages and Multiples

Oh boy. If you've been following my blog, you will have read in the first few about the miscarriage that I had before conceiving and having Sprout. It was a crazy event, and it all took place over the Christmas holidays in 2008 (Sprout was conceived in March of 2009). I won't go into too many details right now, but it was one of the most difficult things I have gone through. There are too many emotions to describe. The one that always comes back to me is how I just wanted them to do the surgery before Christmas because I didn't know how to survive for that extra week knowing I had a dead baby inside of me. It was a horrible feeling. I felt so guilty for wanting it all to be over, but my body was still so very convinced that I was pregnant that I was starting to show, and still feeling sick. Looking back, I probably felt so sick between weeks 6 and 12 because the baby had already died. I say baby, some say embryo. Either way, I know there was a beating heart in there before it died - we had an ultrasound and the baby had a slow-ish heart rate, but they said it isn't that uncommon and can pick up later on. Not the case with us. We were so incredibly blessed to become pregnant so quickly afterwards with Sprout, and that I had a fairly healthy and uneventful pregnancy.

Reflecting now, my pregnancy was really awesome up until I had pretty severe muscle tearing and separation that left me bruised internally and externally along my ribcage on both sides, and down the middle of my already-swollen abdomen. That was at around 25-26 weeks, and I had to go off on modified bedrest (which SUCKED). I ate way too much Haagen Dazs, and got reeeeeally big. Like, bigger than necessary big. Thank goodness I have a decent metabolism, because I dropped the 45-50lbs I gained during pregnancy plus another 10lbs that was still extra from the previous pregnancy that miscarried.

Why am I talking so much about pregnancy again, and not about Sprout and her crazy one-year birthday party? I'll talk about the party when we get to 'P'. Don't get thinking you're all psychic on me now and guess that 'Multiples' means I am having twins...

Multiples simply refers to the fact that WE'RE HAVING ANOTHER BABY!!!! I am so excited to announce that our little Seedling (aka Baby #2) is due June 6th, 2011!! We weren't quite expecting to conceive as quickly as we did this time - after all, the pregnancy before Sprout took a year to conceive, and then it was the FIRST try with Sprout, so we figured it would average out around 4-6 months to conceive this time. We couldn't be that lucky again, right? Wrong!!!! So Sprout and Seedling will be 18.5 months apart, which in my mind will be awesome. I am so looking forward to having a second baby in the summertime! Sprout can still have pool parties, we can go for walks with the pooch, and have fun friend play dates outside. That, and I won't have to bundle up a newborn and a toddler to go out in -30 weather for 6 months.

Don't think I'm a total moron - I know it is going to be a challenge, but I am absolutely up for it. I can't imagine anything better than Sprout having a sibling so close in age. I hope that they grow up to be friends, and not the opposite. Part of me is secretly hoping that I am having another girl, just so she could have a really close sister. On the other hand, I don't know if I would feel like I was done having kids if I had another girl...I don't think I would feel like my family was quite complete without a little boy. Ahhh. Either way, I am so happy to be pregnant again.

Has it been easy? NO!!!! What happened to the pregnancy where I just stuffed my face for 9 months and only spewed once!? I have been vomiting at least twice daily up until the last few weeks, and I have been taking Diclectin, wearing Sea Bands, etc. They all help, just not enough that they completely prevent me from throwing up morning, noon, and night. That's the other thing - it's been ALL DAY sickness, and all night too. It's hard enough to get enough rest without waking up feeling nauseated at 2:30 in the morning when I have to get up to pee. Anyways, enough complaining.

We've been for 2 ultrasounds already (just precautionary due to previous complications, etc.), and I have been on a strict regimen of Prometrium (progesterone), Baby Aspirin (until 34 weeks), and my wonder-drug-Diclectin. Everything looks fantastic so far, and Seedling is super active already! I have a doppler at home and have been checking the heartbeat daily, and it has been exactly what Sprout's was at this stage: between 165-175. Usually it sits at 167/168. It makes me wonder how different two pregnancies could be with two girls, or if the differences this time really do indicate that I am, indeed, having a boy. Ultrasound on Jan 10th, and then we'll see (but we're NOT sharing!). All I will say is the names are chosen, and if I have my way, I WILL be sharing them with friends and family, because I know WAY too many people who are due in May and June 2011, and I don't want anyone poaching my names! My husband is far too picky - I don't know what I would do if our names got 'stolen' just before we had Seedling. Ha. Maybe Seedling would just have to stick!

I'll keep you all updated on how things are going, and any twists and turns this rollercoaster takes over the next 5 1/2 months! Look out, Sprout!! You're going to have to take on the role of BIG SISTER soon! I know you'll be ready for it, and that you will give your new sibling more love than even we can imagine right now. You already give Mommy's baby hugs and kisses, and point Seedling out when I ask you where Mommy's baby is - that is, after you point to yourself and sign 'baby'. You will always be Mommy's first baby girl, and I will love you forever, and never any less once Seedling arrives. My love for all of our family will just keep growing and growing as you grow and grow too. Sleep tight, my little Sprout.

You too, Seedling.

xoxo

Mommy

Kiss Kiss. Love Love.

I'm skipping the letter 'K'. Kind of. I've been so busy getting things ready for Sprout's first birthday party that blogging has been left in the confetti dust and sprinkle fragments in my kitchen. Just a quick little note that begins with 'K'.

Kiss Kiss

Sprout gives the most adorable, slobbery kisses ever, and the one trick that she performs on a fairly regular basis that makes my heart just leap is blowing kisses. When she does it, it is a wholehearted kiss, sound ("MMMWAH!") included. Absolutely priceless, and so sweet.

L.O.V.E.

Sigh. The big 1 is almost here, and I can already feel the anxiety creeping up the back of my shoulders and spine. It is such a bittersweet occasion. On one hand, I am so incredibly proud of her achievements in her first year. She says so many words now that I have completely lost count, and everything that I say to her, she REALLY tries to repeat back to me. She's a little parrot who tries to copy absolutely everything you do. So cute. She has taken one or two steps here and there, but is still a little chicken when it comes to walking - that's totally fine with me! The fact that she can communicate what she wants the majority of the time makes my life so much easier. Walking will just complicate things! Sprout can wait as long as she wants to walk. And run. And fall into things. And scrape her little knees. Sigh. They get too big too quickly. That's the other side of things.

I am so amazed that in the last two years, I have conceived a child, gone through a pregnancy, and raised a beautiful little girl up through her first year of life. Wow. Where does the time go? Really, I'd like to know! I am so proud of her, but there are moments where I just want to freeze time and stay there a little while longer. The nights where I spoil her just a little bit and let her fall asleep on my shoulder in the rocking chair are extremely selfish. I just love feeling the weight of her sleeping body pressed against my chest; the little rise and fall of her back as she breathes deeply; the little sighs she lets out as she falls into a deep, restful slumber. There is nothing more peaceful and angelic than a sleeping child. And as big as she is, as many words as she can say, as much as she is becoming more toddler than baby, when she is asleep with those long dark lashes fringing on her cheeks, she is my baby girl. She is still one hour old, snoozing gracefully on my chest, smelling so sweet and new. I understand now how parents, especially mothers, have a hard time watching their kids grow up and become adults. How am I possibly going to handle letting her go off to college, or travel the world without me? How in the world will I allow her to get her heart broken for the first time? That overprotectiveness we all absolutely hate our mothers for during those pivotal teenage years? I get it now. You just want to protect them forever, and hang onto those sweet childhood and baby moments.

I am treasuring this last week of non-toddler Sprout. Every minute, every second, every hour, every day. She's getting spoiled with lots of snuggles. Once that one year mark passes, it's gone. Bittersweet, like I said. On the up side, her party is going to be spectacular! SO many people are coming, it will be a bit of a crazy event, but she is so lucky to have that many people that love her.

Enjoy this week, Sprout. Know that Mommy loves you more than anything in the entire world, and that I am so thankful and blessed to have you in my life. Even when I tell you to stay out of the dog water dish, I still love you. Remember that.

xoxoxo

Mommy

Jumpin' Jellyfish!

Brrrrrr! I stepped out my back door this morning with one toe to yell at my yappy pooch and was completely caught off-guard by the frosty chill in the air! Not that I should be...it IS already the 18th of October. Sprout is 11 months old today. So hard to believe. I look back at pictures of myself pregnant, and it seems so surreal already. Was I really that big? Sigh. One more month until her BIG birthday party! We've rented a hall. Our families are huge, and we have people coming in from out of town, so I figured it would be best to just have a super gigantic party - especially for her first one.

This blog will be a short one today, just because I'm venting about something I don't really want to spend much time on.

'J' is for Jealousy

**By the way, if you know where the title for this blog came from, I will give you 500 points. I don't know what you could redeem those points for...maybe a hug?**

We have a dog. I know that I have mentioned her before, in a previous post where I discussed when we got rid of our other, bigger dog. Thus far, I really haven't been able to complain about Roxy. You couldn't ask for a better dog for Sprout! She lets her roll on her, kiss her, hug her, pull her hair and her tail, and she never growls or anything, just looks at me with this disdainful scowl that seems to say "Really? You're just going to let her do this?". I always respond by saying, "Yes. She is the boss of you." This weekend, however, and lately when we have had other people over, we've had a bit of a jealousy issue.

My dog is a female, but she is always trying to...well...*ahem*...dominate everything and everyone that takes attention away from her, if you catch my drift. Everyone always asks me why she does it, and it is purely an act of dominance, and jealousy. Gross still - she 'dominated' Sprout's little friend's head a few weeks back, and I was mortified. So we had a house full of people this weekend to celebrate my 25th birthday, and the whole time, Roxy was either getting in everyone's face, shoving her way in front of Sprout, or trying to 'dominate' our guests AND our baby. Unacceptable. I was so mad, I could have tossed her out the front door to fend for herself. I never would, actually, she just drives me bonkers sometimes.

So while she is a good dog, and very good with Sprout, we've got an obvious jealousy issue that needs to be addressed. I will be watching a LOT of Cesar Millan this week to try and get some solutions. Maybe I'll even send an email. Nobody wants a dog 'dominating' their child when they come to visit, or their leg...or arm...or foot. It's ridiculous. I know they have instincts, but seriously. Ew.

Sprout has her second cold, already, only a week after finally shedding the last snot ball from her first cold. I am battling the same thing, but seem to be doing much better than her. She's got the stuffy, runny nose, chest cough, fever, super flushed cheeks, and a rash on her back and down her arms. Thus, I am not spending much time blogging today, as I fear that her nap is going to be fairly short-lived. I hope you have a wonderful day, and that you weren't bored by my puppy rant.

Brace yourself, Sprout. Mommy's coming upstairs armed with Q-Tips, Boogie Wipes, and Tylenol. Let the hog-tie begin.

xoxoxo

Mommy

Ha ha ha ha! Inconceivable!

I fear that this alphabetical theme of mine is moving forwards rather slowly. Therefore, today I will be cheating and doing both 'H' and 'I'.

'H' is for Health

My poor little Sprout got her first real cold about two weeks ago, and as mild as it was, I couldn't help but baby her and feel horrible about the fact that she was sick. As a mother, I think I always wonder if there wasn't something I could have done to prevent an illness, injury, etc. Silly, I know, but I keep thinking..."what if I would have doused the handles of the grocery basket with hand sanitizer?" Her little stuffy nose is what got me the most. Here's my dilemma: I can handle most bodily gross-outs from any baby, child, or adult - it doesn't have to be my own. Vomit, poop, blood, cuts, childbirth...anything goes. The one thing that will drive me to toss my own cookies (or just dry heave with my hand clamped over my mouth) is...*shudder*...SNOT.

That's right. The green, yellow, and white strings of mucous that stream from a child's nose (even my own) in that ever-disgusting number eleven down to their upper lip make me lose my cool. I had to look away every time Sprout sneezed out another snot ball, which made me feel bad, because she didn't like having her nose oozing out boogers either. Or having her nose wiped, for that matter. So began the battle of mother, daughter, snot, and Kleenex. I tried using saline drops and suctioning out her nose, but then she just screamed like I was about to club her over the head with a piano - I'm sure the neighbours would have thought something was up if we continued that. When she had her three daily bottles (nap, nap, bedtime), the sound of her trying to breathe and slurp back her milk was heartbreaking. Thank goodness colds don't last for very long, or else I would have lost my mind.

Now, I know I shouldn't be complaining about Sprout's health, and I'm not, really. It was just the first time that she has ever been sick with something "normal", instead of her allergies or the episode of baby measles a few months ago. I am very fortunate to have a healthy, happy baby, and feel so awful for those who have to deal with days, months, or years of their child's hospitalization, treatments, and testing. I don't know how I would hold up in that kind of a situation. I'm already a sucker when she's not feeling good. The one night, I even went and took her into the spare bedroom to sleep with me because she was awake for hours and couldn't sleep because of her cough and stuffy nose. Poor kid. Anyways, now her cold is just about completely gone. All that is left are the remnants of early morning snot battles characterized by a crusty little nose that, as per usual, she HATES having wiped.

'I' is for Intelligence

Okay, I know I'm a little biased, and I hate to brag here, but...seriously...Sprout is amazingly intelligent. She blows me away every day. At 10.5 months old, here is her list of steady words that she can say (and usually does, on command):

Mama

Dada

Ba Ba (bottle)

Pup-pup (puppy)

Nona (my mother insisted on being called Noni, but Sprout is even smarter when she tries - Nona is Italian for Grandmother!)

Grandpa

Pah (she says Up backwards...)

Num-Num

Banana

Hi

The list could probably go on, I just can't think of any more that she will say on a regular basis. If she points at something and looks at me, I always tell her what it is, and have always told her to look at my lips when I say it. Now, every time I do that, she makes a very concerted effort to say the word herself. It is amazing! I'm sure there are a million kids who talk early, and Sprout won't be walking early or anything, but it makes me so damn proud to see her accomplishments! Not only the talking, but she waves hi and bye, claps, blows kisses, points, shakes her head no (in context), opens and closes her hands when she wants something, and has now started walking around the furniture when she pulls herself up. This year has gone by so fast, I just can't believe all of the changes in the last couple of months, and how much she has grown and learned. Like I said, I don't like to seem like a braggart...but she IS really, really smart!

Alright, now that I've puffed up my little Sprout's teeny ego, I should really go and do some housework. Homemade chicken noodle soup for supper tonight, Sprout. Mama's going to be busy working magic in the kitchen!

xoxoxo

Mommy

Ghouls and Goblins

Yep, you guessed it. This blog is going to be about...ghosts. It's not a spooky *oooh* ghost kind of blog, even though Hallowe'en is coming up in a month or so. (Speaking of which, Sprout is being a DRAGON - can't wait to post photos!!)

I'll have to go back a little ways and start at the beginning. My first funeral that I ever attended was that of my Great-Grandmother (on my Mom's side). She was an amazing woman, and incredible writer. I give her full credit for sparking my love for poetry. We used to go and visit her - she lived in an assisted care facility in Camrose - and she would give me advice about writing and let me rifle through her written work. When she passed away, I was asked if I would write a poem and read it at her service. At the ripe old age of 13, I thought it would be a wonderful way to pay tribute to her. I remember not wavering at all in my voice, but being frozen to the floor staring down at the small-ish wooden box that she was inside at the front of the church. I didn't look up the entire time that I read. At the internment, there was a moment of quiet awe as the sun came out from behind a cloud, and a flock of small birds burst forth from a tree close by the gravesite. Was it her? Was it God? Who knows? But it was really incredible.

After that day, I began to have dreams about her, and not just a foggy dream. Vivid ones, where I could feel touch, smell things, taste food, etc. She would ask me questions about our family, and continue to give me advice on my writing. I have a very large imagination, and at the time I just thought it was my subconscious way of expressing that I missed having her around to visit and talk to. Lately though, I have begun to think otherwise.

In January of 2009, my Grandfather (also on my Mom's side) passed away after a very brief battle with lung cancer. It was extremely hard on our entire family. He always seemed like this big, strong rock that held everyone together, and to see him crumble and wither over such a short period of time was something I will never forget. As Sprout was born in November, she got to spend a very short two-month span going back and forth to visit her Great-Grandpa at the palliative care facility where he was admitted. It was amazing to see how much she brightened his days. Each time we would visit, even if she was crabby as a crab, when I laid her beside him to snuggle in his bed, she would quiet down and snuggle into him and go to sleep. It was amazing to watch. He loved her, and she loved him. Like I said before, his passing was very difficult for all of us. I grew up living in my Grandma & Grandpa's house until I was 10 years old, and my sister and I have always been close to both of them. Again, I was asked to write and read something at his service, and I did, but this time, I didn't hold myself together as well.

Nothing crazy happened at the service, and there was no internment, as he was cremated, but I have had numerous dreams about him since he passed. The latest was so vivid and real that I was actually woken up by the fact that I was sobbing in my sleep. Here's how it went: my whole extended family was together, and we were at my Grandma's old house (the one I grew up in), and my Grandpa was there. He came and sat down next to me and was talking to me about Sprout. He told me how beautiful she was, and how much she had grown and changed, and that he was so proud of me as a mother. That was enough to set me off crying, but then he started talking about my cousin, who is due with her first child this year. Up until this point, I think we all said we thought she was having a girl, but his exact words to me were "You know, she's having a boy." And he also informed me that when he was born, I was to make sure that the little guy had a jacket just like the one he was wearing. He had on a denim jacket with a brown corduroy collar on it, and I'm sure it was an actual jacket he owned (confirmed by my Grandma). I hugged him, and I swear I could feel his arms around me, and smell the faint hints of sawdust and vanilla pipe tobacco that were nostalgically familiar. It was at that point that I started to cry in the dream, and woke up absolutely sobbing. My poor husband - at 6:00 in the morning, I don't think he was awake enough to even know what to do! It will be interesting to see if she does, indeed, have a boy. If she does, I'd better start hunting for a jacket like that, or create one somehow.

So the question remains: do I believe in ghosts? Do you? Whatever your beliefs or thoughts, it is comforting to think that those that we miss so fiercely in death find their way back into our lives somehow and continue to watch over us and the ones we love throughout our days. Sprout will undoubtedly not remember her cuddles with her Great-Grandpa, but we have photos and can tell her all about it and what he was like; that it is really too bad that she didn't get to spend more time with him. Maybe he will find his way into her dreams someday. For now, I will just keep my memories alive, and hope that wherever he is, he knows he is still loved.

Let me know if anyone ever visits your dreams, Sprout. Even if it's our brains creating a subconscious fantasy, it still feels pretty incredible.

xoxoxo

Mommy

Frankie? Really?

Oh, the letter 'F'. It could stand for so many things. It reminds me of that commercial they had on a few years back about the Knorr frozen dinners, where they bleeped out the word "frozen" and made it sound like...well...something else. Hilarious. Had me in stitches every single time. The title of this blog refers to the comment my loving husband made when we were talking about girl names back in my giant prego days. I have always LOVED the name Frankie for a girl, but we both decided against it. There weren't any longer names that would shorten to Frankie that either of us really liked. Francesca, Francis, Francine. Nope. None of them seemed right, so we just left Frankie by the wayside. 'F' could stand for fun, facetiousness, fancy, farting (not me, the dog...changed her food lately and she has such bad gas that she lets 'er rip constantly...and audibly..*gag*), flirting, etc. I could go on and on. Today, though, the letter 'F' is for something a little more...friendly...

'F' is for Family

Where would I be without my family? Probably stuck under a rock somewhere with my arms and legs flailing. But seriously now, family is one of the most important things to me, and it is incredible how much more important your own little family unit becomes when you bring a child into the mix. Before Sprout, it was difficult to think of my husband and I as our own family. Family was supposed to be about having everyone together, eating good food (mmm...apple salad...secret family recipe to follow), having good conversation, and watching the kids all run and play (or being a kid and going to play). Now that I have grown up - a little - and started my own family, things sure have changed. Not that my extended family members aren't important, it's just...my husband and Sprout are MY family - the one that will grow outwards from us, now. Strange to think of.

I remember being a little girl and playing with my cousins, never once wondering what life would bring us, or whether we would remain close as adults. Time shifts everything, even family. As we age, we become closer with some and more distant with others. Those large family get-togethers become fewer and farther between, and when they do happen, not everyone is there. We get married (or not), have kids (or not), and eventually become our own family units. Going for Christmas dinner at Grandma's house becomes going for Christmas dinner at my mom's house...who is Sprout's Grandma...weird. The shift is eventual and gradual, and will definitely take some time to get used to, but it is a welcome change. The memories and family bond that I created as a child will become Sprout's with our 'new' family and the changing way our holidays/birthdays/etc. are celebrated.

It makes me feel sadly nostalgic to think about those Christmas Eves spent playing with all of my cousins at my Grandma's house. The smell of turkey, ham, gravy, and sweet potatoes permeating the air. Grandpa whistling carols at the dining room table. Presents piled halfway across the living room because they just didn't fit underneath the tree - well, that one is usually still true on Christmas Day at my mom's house. We have a tendency (as a family) to go overboard. An actual fire roaring in the fireplace. Snowball fights in the back yard. As much as I miss all of it myself, I am so excited to watch Sprout grow and create lasting memories for herself with our 'new' family. She'll have a much smaller one, less cousins, and possibly more chaos with the traveling we have to do to Southern Alberta to visit the in-laws, but it will be what she knows. I think it's always going to be hard, knowing that I had SO many cousins to play with growing up, and that there were waaaaaay too many aunts and uncles crammed into my Grandma's house. Sprout isn't going to have quite the same experience, but I seem to forget that those are MY memories, not hers, and she will grow up (hopefully) to feel the same nostalgic feelings about her own childhood when she has children of her own.

I've never understood those that don't make their family a priority. Family is what you make of it. To be able to look back on your life and say that you were surrounded by loving family & friends is enough of an accomplishment for a single lifetime, don't you think? We all overwork ourselves, strive for more money, less problems, more 'things'. I understand that working is a part of everyday life, without which you can't even support a family, but do we really need all that we 'work for'? Will those 'things' really be worth the time and effort put into them by the end of your life? Think about it sometime. I challenge you to take some time this next month and devote it to your family - extended or otherwise. If you don't have family, devote it to your closest friends. Find out what they are in need of, lend a helping hand, be supportive. Be thankful f0r what you have. I know I am. Even when she's whining, miserable, teething, or otherwise, my little Sprout is still a miracle to me. She is my gift from God that I will never do enough in this lifetime to deserve. She is my family. You will always be my priority, my Sprout. Family always is.

xoxoxo

Mommy

Apple Salad

5-6 Medium-sized apples (Macintosh work well, or Golden Delicious)

2 cups Whipping cream

1 tsp Vanilla (not the fake stuff)

1 tsp Cinnamon

2 Tbsp Confectioner's sugar

Prepare the whipping cream: whip with a stand or hand mixer on medium speed until soft peaks form. Add the vanilla, cinnamon, and confectioner's sugar. Continue to whip on medium until desired consistency. Core, peel, and dice apples into small chunks. Fold whipping cream into apples. Top with a sprinkle of cinnamon & confectioners sugar. Cover and refrigerate until ready to serve (at least 1 hour).

Elephant Ears...mmm...

I've been having a really difficult time rifling through my brain-files for an "E" topic to write about. For the past couple of weeks, I have been unendingly busy with work - both my massage therapy job and my home-based Little Sprout Designs. I don't want to complain, because I am so grateful that I have so many supportive clients and customers for both ventures, but I am flat-out exhausted. Hey! There's one!

E is for Exhaustion

Boy, do I know about exhaustion. I strive to live my life every day as though it will be my last. Sometimes, I am really not very good at that - I have a tendency to let the small things bother me, and let myself get worked up about stuff that doesn't really matter, in the grand scheme of life. Lately, I have been so stressed out about absolutely everything that I allowed myself to get run down, and have ended up with a wicked cough & cold. That, in itself, makes everything more difficult. Imagine going for a massage appointment - supposed to be relaxing, right? - and having a therapist who is coughing and sniffling through your entire treatment. I can't afford to take time off of work, but #1: I feel horrible, and #2: Who wants to be massaged by someone hacking and sneezing and sniffling the whole time?

Whine, whine, whine. I know, right? Maybe I should call this the Whiny Mom Blog. Either way, I have been having a rough time lately, but on the up side of things - business has been very fruitful. I am really looking forward to the BIG craft show in November (see: www.weestock.ca for more info) now, and starting to stockpile all of my items! Seeing as how this might be one of the last semi-nice sunny days, I think I will take my little Sprout outside for some product photo-ops! Nothing could be cuter than a little girl in a pretty pink tutu on the still partially-green grass in the sunshine!! Ah, but I digress.

We will be going away this weekend to visit the in-laws down in Southern Alberta, which makes for a bit of a break from all the hustle and bustle. Sure, it's work to get everything packed up for a 9.5 month old, us, and a dog, but once we get there, it's quiet and relaxing. If I won the lottery, I would build a big house somewhere in the Coulees and wake up every day to the giant Alberta sky and the mountains. I'll be confiscating my mother-in-law's digital SLR to take some photos this weekend - stay tuned for the next blog..."F" could be for a number of things (ha ha), but it will probably have something to do with "Farm". Off to the cows we go, Sprout. Pack up your gumboots and leave your frilly tutus at home.

xoxoxo

Mommy

Dinglehopper.

I have a feeling that 'E' is going to be for exhaustion. Not from Sprout, really, although she has become quite the crabby mc teething monster lately. No, the exhaustion has been stemming from an ongoing issue with my thyroid gland. I have an autoimmune thyroid disease called Hashimoto's Thyroiditis. Google it. I'm too tired to explain! But I digress, and I am skipping the letter of the day! Let's talk about some more depressing things, seeing as how I'm in that kind of mood today (and depressed starts with 'D'). Oh, and it's raining outside. Perfect.

D is for Dieting and Debt.

The first of our 'D' words today - diet - is something that has been nonexistent in my life. I have never gone on one, or tried some new fad (Atkins, etc.) to get my body into the shape that I would like. I suppose the next blog subject could be exercise...or a total lack thereof. Lately, I have been feeling a little down about the current state of my post-prego body. I can't really complain, and will probably get smacked if I do, but here's my issue: I've lost above and beyond the weight that I gained during my pregnancy (and the miscarried one previous to it), but there have been seemingly irreversable changes to the structure of my *ahem* curves that I am none too pleased with. First off - what the hell happened to my hips and upper thighs? They turned to Jello post-partum and haven't gotten any sort of structure back. I haven't been trying that hard, but it's not like I sit on my ass all day and do nothing. I haul around a twenty-something pound child all day every day. The stretch marks that gouged my ass, inner and outer thighs, and lower back are ALL still there. They aren't quite as purple, but they are definitely not going anywhere anytime soon. My belly button has turned into a deep cavernous pit that is only good for catching disgusting amounts of lint and looking gross in a bikini. To top it all off, though, I think the worst change has been the deflation of my once-gloriously-perky-and-full breasts. As soon as I stopped pumping, it was as though someone stuck each one with a pin and they wheezed their last puff of perkiness out, leaving me with saggy pancakes that are a full cup size smaller than they used to be. Boo-freaking-hoo, right? Sob story, I know. But no matter what, and even though I would sacrifice my body all over again for my beautiful little girl, it is still hard to walk past that bathroom mirror and get in the shower. Most days I run. It will get better, and if I actually get motivated to do something about the saggy baggies (breasts and thighs), I might perk up - literally.

On to the next topic. Debt. It's a scary one. Being off for 13 weeks before I gave birth to Sprout really didn't help with our debt situation. I went back to work after 3.5 months at home, but that is a LONG time to be living off of one person's income. And we weren't really living, we just went further and further into debt each and every month, although we were being careful. Lately, I don't know what happened, but it seems like all responsibility has gone out the window for both of us. We've gotten FAR beyond minor debt, and right now it really seems like we're never going to get out. Both of us have had to renounce our bad habits. Mine - online shopping. His - small purchases (coffee, lunches out, etc.) that have really added up. The driving force behind getting rid of our debt? Wanting to have another child in the next year and a half, and being able to put money away for both every month for their futures.

So those are my dilemmas. Trivial, I know. In the grand scheme of life, neither really matter. We are all healthy, and have a beautiful daughter who is not lacking in anything, especially love. I need to stop shopping, and stop being shallow. I'm alive. My hair is in desperate need of a dinglehopper (see: The Little Mermaid), but otherwise I'm doing okay (Ha!). Whiny little Sprout is currently stuck between her crawl and sitting positions - hilarious, but she's getting awfully frustrated. Mommy to the rescue, little one!

xoxoxo

Mommy

Cookie cookie cookie starts with 'C'!

Okay, the word of the day is NOT cookie, although that does start with 'C', as does confection (tee hee!). Instead, the word that I'm commencing (ha) my blog with today is...

C is for Change

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes...ah, how I love Bowie. Sprout will be 9 months old in less than two weeks, and I cannot believe all of the ways in which my life and self have changed. By self, I don't only mean my body. Those changes are painfully apparent, though maybe not to those who see me fully clothed (ie. everyone but my husband and daughter). I am totally floored by the way that I, myself, have grown and changed into a different person.

When you give birth to a child, you are their mother - obviously - but you aren't necessarily a 'mom'. I have found that over the past 9 months, I have absolutely grown into motherhood and become a full-on 'mom'. No, that doesn't mean I've given up my cute jeans for pleated-front, tapered-ankle khakis (smart ass). What it does encompass is me giving up more and more of my younger, less mature self as time goes on. Don't get me wrong, I still like to throw my jammies on and have a Super Mario party with my husband until 2:00 a.m. every once in a while, but I have had to come to terms with the fact that things like summer holidays aren't going to be what they were when I was growing up.

We just finished a week of holidays, which started and ended with two different camping trips. I used to absolutely LOVE camping. Sleeping in a tent, waking up feeling icy cold air on my face with my body snuggled tight into a sleeping bag. Ahhhh. That was the life. Being able to run around, swim all day, go tubing, lounge and tan, eat snacks. It was awesome. Taking a 8.5 month old baby camping in a tent? Still fun, but...different. Less sleep, for sure. Here's where things take a positive spin though. I actually had more fun camping this year with less sleep and freedom and more crying and whining than I ever have in my life! Watching Sprout lose her mind in the lake day after day trying to swim around made me feel so nostalgic and happy. I definitely threatened both Sprout and my husband with leaving early the second night after Sprout had a major teething/lack of sleep/I-don't-know-what-the-hell-was-wrong-with-her meltdown and the man SLEPT through 99% of it all, but when we got up in the morning and went for a walk through the dewey grass in the already-hot sun, all was forgotten.

Speaking of changes, Sprout has gone through some major milestones and changes in the past couple of weeks. I had her measured and weighed at the health unit in town, and she has grown enough in length now that she is just above the 50th percentile for height, and now down to the 75th for weight (she's been in the 90th her whole life so far...). She's slimming down, although to the less constant observer, she's still a chub-monster. Sprout has the backwards shimmy-crawl mastered, and has gotten herself around for the past month and a half rolling, shoving, and back-crawling her way around the house. Yesterday, she forwards-crawled (not super coordinated yet) three feet across the living room rug to me! I whisked her up off the floor into a super bear hug and whispered "just start slowly so Mommy doesn't have a breakdown" into her ear. Already this past week, she cut her second bottom tooth (not going to talk about teething, because it makes me crabby to even think about it) and said her first word ("Mama" - we've got proof on tape! And she almost says "Puppy"...it comes out "pup pup pup pup"). They grow up so fast through the first year, it's really sad to see it all go by!

A friend of mine just had a beautiful baby girl, and going to visit her made me confirm that I want to start trying for a second baby after Sprout turns one in November. I look at Sprout now, and she is getting to be such a big girl, and so much less of a "baby". Sure, she still needs snuggles, and to be fed, and diaper changes, and she certainly isn't walking yet, but I know that those days are numbered. My niece starts kindergarten this fall, and I feel like I blinked and she's so grown up! I'm holding on to these last baby days for as long as I possibly can. I told Sprout that she can wait to crawl, walk, talk, and grow for as long as she wants to - Mommy doesn't mind.

As per usual, I start writing about her, and she wakes up from her nap. Hearing her say "Mama" with the tone of "umm...I'm awake! where are you?" over the monitor makes my eyes tear up. *Sniff sniff* on my way, little Sprout.

xoxoxo

Mommy

Buttercups and Bumblebees

Today's blog is brought to you by the letter B. Before I begin, because it's been bugging my brain, a baby that backwards-crawls begs the question: when the heck are you going to learn to go forwards!!? I've always loved alliterations, can you tell? But seriously now, today's letter is indeed B, and I fully intend on finding a topic that goes with my alphabetic theme. Hmm. B..b...b.......b....b. Hmm.

B is for BabySteals.

Because really, what else could it be? If you don't know about www.babysteals.com (or KidSteals, or ScrapbookSteals...), you're absolutely missing out! Every day at 9:00am, they post a new 'steal' for the day. Usually, it's a hot ticket item that is offered at half-price, or even less! I have bought many a steal from them and have been wowed by their awesome customer service, inexpensive international shipping costs, and quick turnaround. My ErgoBaby carrier came from them, and there is NO way I would have been able to afford one at full price. Some of Sprout's favourite toys, like her HABA soft puzzle blocks, have come from BabySteals. I have bought BabyLegs from them, and more recently, a set of cloth GroBaby diapers that are amazing!

Am I a little bit addicted? Yes. Do I have to remember that clicking a button IS the same thing as putting cash in someone else's hands? Yes. But it's really hard sometimes when it's a reeeeeally good steal! It's a great place for picking up baby gifts, like the Lollitop hats that pop up every once in a while, and nice to find things on the KidSteals site for when Sprout gets a little bigger! Anyways, I've been blogging for a while and hadn't mentioned it previously, so I thought I'd give those of you who didn't know about it a BIG heads-up!

Short blog again, but at least it was done sooner rather than later! Now for another B...I'm finding a way to acquire a Bumble bag, Sprout. Not really for you, but to hold all of your beautiful clothes and cloth diapers! Our current Lug bag is just not big enough. Bargains, here I come!

xoxoxo

Mommy

Today's Blog...brought to you by the letter...A!

I have decided that I need to have some kind of motivation to keep blogging on a regular basis. Even if nobody else reads it, I find it good to vent...except that I am having a hard time pulling things out of my life to vent about. For my upcoming 'themed' blogs, I am going to do the age-old, easy-peasy alphabet trick. I'm going to write about something that begins with each letter of the alphabet. Am I going to write every day? Probably not. I'll try though, and that (hopefully) counts for something.

A is for Applesauce

The first post is going to be boring. Sorry, but life has been so hectic lately - as it is every summer - that I just wanted to give a few tidbits out on teething tricks that have somewhat assuaged my daughter's screamy days.

I have found that the best things to give Sprout when she is really, REALLY bitey (when she scooches over to me on the floor to bite my feet, legs, arms, etc.) are ice cold applesauce right out of the fridge, and partially thawed frozen strawberry chunks in a mesh feeding bag.

Fruit really seems to hit the spot when she's teething, and the cold variety seems to help a lot with what appears to be frustration (she bites everything and then shakes it while biting - hilarious, but a little too much learning going on from the dog, I fear...)

Please use caution with strawberries, as they are a high-allergenic food. Sprout has been fine with all of the so-called allergenic foods except for dairy, but her cousins don't do well with cinnamon or strawberries so we watched her closely after her first couple of interactions.

Sorry for the boring blog, but life is kind of relaxed and peachy right now. On my way to put more applesauce in the fridge, Sprout. Lucky girl, this time it's a blueberry-apple blend (unsweetened, of course!). Enjoy the rest of your nap!

xoxoxo

Mommy

All things change with time.

So it's the eve of the last time I am going to pump for Sprout, and I am feeling so many emotions. I know that it's not the same as breastfeeding - it's not like I had some kind of deranged attachment to my pump or anything - but I still feel a little sad that I am not going to be supplying sustenance for my daughter anymore. The plan is to continue feeding her frozen breastmilk combined with a small amount of formula to get her acquainted with it until we run out of my icy supply from the basement. Is it completely irrational for me to still feel a minute amount of guilt about the formula?

It is my decision to stop pumping. I could continue, and that is the driving force behind my guilt. I have already had to let go of breastfeeding, and now that Sprout is close to crawling (she doesn't quite get up on her knees, but she does push herself all the way up on her hands and perform a mad backwards shimmy) I just feel like she's growing up too fast. Pumping for her was the one thing that I was doing that let me hold on to the baby phase.

On the positive side of things, I can start eating dairy again! That, and I can have the occasional glass or two of wine and not have to watch the clock before I pump. I don't have to stay up past midnight every night for the last pump of the day, and I don't have to scramble to pump first thing in the morning. Going out during the day will have many less restrictions, which is awesome. I won't have to worry about getting home at a certain point in the afternoon and leaving events early so that I can pump. No more pumping in the car on road trips, running the dishwasher more than necessary to clean the pump parts, buying supplementary pump parts to replace worn out ones, etc. etc.

On paper, it looks like the pros list is much longer than the cons; however, the way that I feel creates a list of emotions about five miles long. So here's a toast to the nutrients I have been able to provide for you, Sprout. I am so proud of how you have grown, and I cannot help but smile when I think about the fact that I have monumentally contributed to your development and physical growth. I hope that you continue to stay healthy and happy, and I know that this switch will affect me much more than you will even notice! Mommy is going to move on to a more relaxing hobby of crafting. I love you more than life itself, little Sprout.

xoxoxo

Mommy

How many bubblegums do you wish?

Oh boy. Here I go again, overloading myself with "things to do". Not only am I working as a massage therapist two evenings and every other Saturday, I have added to my list of activities lately, and am feeling a little fuzzy-headed! Ah well, all is good when I am occupied and frazzled. I seem to function better when I'm busy.

I am also doing a technical writing project for a company based out of E. that I worked for when I was pregnant. It is a little painstaking at times (verrrry boring work) but I am trying to plug through. Teething has set in with a vengeance, so I'm finding it hard to sit down and get stuff done (why I'm blogging right now when I could be working? Hmm...).

I have OPENED MY OWN BUSINESS!! Yay!! As of this past week, Little Sprout Designs is now open via Facebook. Custom orders can be placed through littlesproutdesigns@gmail.com. I haven't been able to get all of my items up on the page yet, but I've started small - pacifier clips! Some are glittery, some are embellished, and all are just plain cute! Tell your friends...

I'll also have embellished hooded towels, tulle tutus, and flowered hats/headbands by the end of July (hopefully). We'll be participating in the Little Monster's Swap Meet in Spruce Grove in August with fellow mompreneurs Sophie Madison (absolutely gorgeous baby blankets), so keep your eyes peeled!

I don't know if the business will go anywhere, but I am having a blast so far doing it, and Sprout just looks cuter and cuter wearing each new creation. She's a very willing little model - always has a new pose! This is a short blog, because I'm running around trying to get ready before Sprout wakes up and we have errands to complete before I dash off to work tonight. Check out our Facebook page, and make sure you direct anyone you think would be interested!

Keep snoozing, Sprout. Maybe if you sleep through a tooth coming in, it won't be so painful (for both of us!).

xoxoxo

Mommy

Domestic...disturbance?

Oh, just kidding. Not in the way that you're probably thinking. Nope, I'm not talking about a vase-chucking (or apple-chucking...), crazy, all-out psycho husband-and-wife spat. What I'm actually referring to is the fact that I have had my culinary curiosity return in the form of creative (and tasty) baby food making spurts. Call it a disturbance of my regularly scheduled domestic duties. I have really been enjoying making meals for Sprout, even when they stem into day-long sessions of steaming and blending...and chilling...and freezing...and transferring frozen cubes to labelled Ziploc bags. Whew. Even that sentence was exhausting.

So while I may not be feeding myself the most nutritious meals all the time, I certainly have discovered that I have the knack for whipping up some delicious treats for my wee one. I have chosen to share three of the "recipes" (I don't usually cook with a recipe, but I've been asked enough times that I have written out a rough guideline of sorts) that Sprout has enjoyed the most, starting with two MEATY dishes. Meat is the hardest thing to get kids to like, usually, and Sprout was a champ at gagging on simple pureed chicken and beef, so these recipes incorporate a couple of tastier additions that actually help to make the food a little smoother. If your baby has a texture aversion, this might help a little. Enjoy cooking, bon appetit to your little ones, and I hope you enjoy your mini-culinary adventuring.

Sweet Sweet Steak (Slow-cooker)

1 round steak, fat trimmed off

2 medium sized sweet potatoes

1 cup green beans

2 cups water

1 bay leaf

1/2 tsp freeze-dried garlic or garlic powder (optional)

Place sweet potatoes on the bottom of the slow cooker; put whole steak and green beans on top. Add water, bay leaf, and garlic. Cover and cook for 10 hours on low, checking the water level occasionally. Allow to cool, and puree/blend to the texture of your choice. Serve warm, or chill for a few hours prior to freezing. Can be stored frozen for up to 3 months.

**I have found that the food processor worked best on this one, and on all beef recipes. A handheld food mill is also great when babies can start eating a little chunkier food.**

Chicken In Disguise

2 chicken breasts, defrosted and cut into chunks

2 apples (whatever kind you like), sliced & cored

5-6 large carrots, washed and cut into chunks (you can peel them if you like, I just give them a little scrub)

1/2-1 cup of water

Pinch of dried rosemary and/or thyme

Place all of the ingredients into a saucepan and bring to a boil over medium-high heat. Cover and reduce heat to low. Allow to simmer until chicken is tender enough to break down slightly on its own (usually about an hour). Can be pureed while hot if you are using an immersion blender; otherwise, allow to cool slightly before pureeing in a blender or food processor. Serve warm, or chill for a few hours prior to freezing. Can be stored frozen for up to 3 months.

Sprout's Favourite Breakfast

1 can coconut milk

1/2 cup water

1/2 cup oatmeal (either ground or not, up to you)

1/2 cup blueberries

1/2 tsp cinnamon (if you're doing spices)

2-3 apples or pears, cored and diced (skin on/off, again up to you - I leave the skin on)

Put the coconut milk, water, and oatmeal into a saucepan and bring just to a boil over medium heat. Reduce heat and add fruit and cinnamon (if using), then cover and simmer until fruit is soft enough to be mashed with a fork. Puree or blend to a texture you are comfortable with. Serve warm, or chill for a few hours prior to freezing. Can be kept frozen for up to 3 months.

You may have to adjust the measurements accordingly...I kind of just wing it, so I tried to narrow it down! You may use more/less water and more/less oatmeal, but the coconut milk is always one can, and the fruit measurements are pretty accurate. I have done this recipe with apples, pears, figs, blueberries, and mangoes, and Sprout seems to LOVE anything made with oatmeal and coconut milk - and I have to admit, I couldn't help but take spoonfuls of the blueberry batch - YUM!

For now, it's off to dreamland for Mommy, Sprout. Time to get some shut-eye and dream up a few new recipes. The neighbour said she made ratatouille for her little guy. Maybe we'll be adventurous and give it a whirl! Get ready for some more new tasty treats. It won't be as bad as the curried sweet potatoes or roasted beets, I promise.

xoxoxo

Mommy

Feeling funky?

After last week's episode of Glee, which the husband and I watched last night (thank you, PVR), I couldn't help but noticing that I've been feeling rather down and in a funk myself. Not as fun when the world around you doesn't break into song and dance every 10 minutes or so. I could do it on my own, but I think I might get thrown into a psych ward. Sure, my days do consist of many different songs and dances to entertain Sprout, but it's not quite the same.

I have no idea why I have been feeling so out of it lately. It's like I have no motivation anymore. I think that I have finally fallen victim to the hurried, busy life that I have created for myself over the past 7 months. All things considered, I'm pretty impressed that I have lasted until now.

Here's the shit I've had to deal with for the last little while (oh, listen to me whine...just for a little):

- Baby. Breastfeeding. Pumping incessantly. Doctors.

- Thyroid flareup. Hair loss. Mood swings.

- NO period. (NOT pregnant) Cramps for weeks.

- Going back to work at 3 months post-partum. BIG mistake.

- Teething. Screaming. Fever. Miserable baby. (This is a recent development)

- Giving dog away. Tolerating other annoying dog.

- Grandpa dying in the midst of Sprout's arrival and first two months.

- Money. Lack thereof. Stress.

- Taking on too much outside of baby and work.

I think I'm just burning out. I wouldn't call it depression, but more along the lines of exhaustion. Even the things that I normally love doing (singing, playing piano, guitar, writing, and a new development - sewing/crafting) seem tedious. All I want to do is take a nap! I'm having a hard time getting motivated to do the fun stuff, let alone clean the house. The days that I have to work in the evenings, I just want to sit around with Sprout (especially if she's in a mood) in my pj's until I absolutely have to shower and get ready. And then I go to work, and have to physically exert myself and scramble to get home before 10:30pm so I can pump and get to bed.

All of this is just me whining about life, and it's ridiculous, but isn't that what a blog is supposed to be about? Boring people writing boring journal entries about their boring lives? Who the hell reads this crap, anyways?

Wow, listen to me...and really, my life is not all that difficult. I constantly remind myself that I have the happiest, easiest baby I have ever met (most days), and that we are so lucky that the husband has such an amazing job, or else we would have lost our house when I was off on modified rest at 25 weeks. Life will always throw curveballs, and there will always be the "woe is me" days, but I have to throw aside all the self-pitying bullshit and be thankful for what I do have. My family is healthy and happy, and we have done an excellent job of taking care of Sprout so far. She is so beautiful, and extremely easygoing. Let's hope she keeps the laid-back personality into her teen years.

I can hear the soft tapping of fat raindrops on my windows now, and can smell that familiar damp scent wafting through my open ensuite window. Growing up in the city, the smell of rain differs much from the deliciously fresh top notes that arise from open fields of grass, wheat, or barley. We smell wet asphalt and we go "mmmm...". Gross, isn't it? But still...(sniffing).

Enjoy the extra ambiance during your nap, little Sprout.

xoxoxo

Mommy

Rollin', rollin', rollin'...my little girl is rollin'.

Let the babyproofing begin! Ack! I can't believe it's time for this already. That newest realization slapped me in the face yesterday when Sprout rolled across the living room rug and got stuck underneath one of my armchairs. As funny as it was to watch her little legs kick in frustration, I've got to do something about keeping her contained and safe now that she is moving around.

I'm pretty sure she's got a little Zoolander in her, as she seems to prefer rolling to the left. That, and her hilarious poses for the camera...sigh. She's getting so big, so quickly.

Yesterday also marked another new development in Sprout's (and my) life - finger foods! I started her on solids at about 4.5 months, and she has rapidly progressed through almost every fruit, vegetable, and meat, and we've been introducing spices for the past couple of weeks (she looooves her morning cereal even more now that it contains cinnamon). I've given her a few things here and there to munch on with her hands - teething biscuits mostly, and pieces of fruit in those little mesh bags - and she really likes being able to feed herself. So I thought, why not try it with some of her dinner food, now that it has more substance and texture? Ahhh. Good idea? Well...it was sure funny!

I plopped a scoop of mashed potatoes onto her high chair tray and waited. And watched. And waited. It only took her a couple of seconds before she grabbed the whole pile with both hands and squished it between her fingers. Seeming very satisfied with herself, she proceeded to continue mashing the starchy mess all over her hands and the tray. Inadvertently, one of her hands ended up in her mouth, and her reaction just about made me drop to the floor in laughter. Her little eyes bugged out of her head, and she turned to look at me with a huge grin on her face, as if to say "HEY! If I grab that stuff and then put my hands in my mouth, I can EAT IT!?" I don't think I've ever laughed that hard in my life! Once she came to the conclusion that she could actually feed herself, it was a flurry of fistfuls of potatoes, flying from the tray to her mouth quicker than she could effectively grab at the food.

The cleanup? Horrible. There were potatoes everywhere. In her hair, hands, nose, eyes, ears, and all over her sleeper, and then there was the high chair. I cleaned it out last night and again this morning, and I swear when I took her out of it after her breakfast, I saw a chunk of potato fall onto the floor. Whatever it was, it wasn't there for long - thank goodness for dogs!

Was the experience worth the result? Absolutely! I am continually amazed with Sprout's development and her fine motor skills, and can't wait to try some more finger foods as she gets a little bit bigger and hopefully gains a tooth or two. I was one proud mama last night, as I tucked Sprout in and she snuggled her lamb, rolled away from me, and shut her eyes. And then I cried. If you are reading this and you have a little one under six months old, hold onto those first months - they fly by way too quickly, and as fun as each new stage is, I always find myself wondering how we got there so fast!

Well, another day of dragging my Sprout around town lies ahead post-naptime. Get your rest, baby, it's going to be a big day!

xoxoxo

Mommy

A collection of letters...

Over the past 6 months - yes, my little Sprout is SIX MONTHS OLD...TODAY!!!! - I have written a couple of letters to her via Facebook that have elicited a few laughs from friends and family. To commemorate her half-birthday, I am posting those letters on my blog, as well as a new one at the close. Enjoy!

1. Dear Sprout,

Thank you. Sleeping 9.5 hours through the night after a sleep-deprived weekend makes for a very happy Mommy & Daddy...and happy baby, I suppose!

xoxoxo

Mommy

2. Dear Sprout,

Why oh why are you awake at 2:00 a.m.? Did I wake you up from your nap too early, or too late? I think you've been talking with those other babies at mom's group. Just because some of them are still up at this hour doesn't mean you have to give in to peer pressure and do it too! Might be trendy, but Mommy's not too happy about it!

xoxoxo

Mommy

3. Dear Sprout,

Thank you for napping for 2 whole hours this morning, and for being so adorable. You make every day so much fun - especially PJ days where we get to laze around in bed all morning! Love you.

xoxoxo

Mommy

4. Dear Sprout,

If you wouldn't mind, could you please try to sleep through the night tonight? Mommy has to work tomorrow night, and will not have time for a nap tomorrow. Also, going to work and meeting new clients whilst NOT appearing to have been dragged backwards through a bush would be a plus.

xoxoxo

Mommy

P.S. Save the spit-up for Daddy when he gets home tomorrow night, okay?

5. Dear Sprout,

Apparently you didn't get the memo about sleeping through the night. Maybe I'll have to paste it onto that giraffe you seem to spend so much time with these days. Either way, make sure you save your crabbiness for Daddy. He'll be on his own from 6:00-10:00 tonight! But don't let on that I told you to, okay? Our little secret!

xoxoxo

Mommy

6. Dear Sprout,

Would you mind saving some crabbiness for your darling father, who thinks it's a real treat to let Mommy be the one to get 3 hours of sleep when she has to work until eleven tonight? Thanks.

xoxoxo

Mommy

7. Dear monstrous brown furry spiders,

My house is NOT your house, despite the nooks and crannies you can squeeze in and out of. Stay OUT.

Thank you,

C.

P.S. Please don't bite my baby. If you're going to bite anything, choose the dog. She'll bite you back.

Now obviously that last letter was not written for or to my little Sprout, but the content still concerned her. I may, from time to time, just post letters on my blog about random happenstances in my everyday life. They might be funny, they might be serious, or a bit of both. I'm concluding my blog today with a more serious letter to my darling Sprout on the occasion of her half-birthday.

Dear Sprout,

Every morning that I wake up to hear your sweet, scratchy morning voice babbling away to the soother in your hand, you make my heart sing. I cannot believe that you are mine, that you have come so far and grown so much in the past year. From the time you were the teeniest, tiniest Sprout, I loved you with my heart and soul. I hope that you will never doubt my love for you, though I'm sure there will be times that you don't understand that my actions are always driven by love (particularly during your teenage years).

You are growing so rapidly that it takes my breath away to look back at clothing and diapers that we wore on you those first exciting weeks at home. The photos we took of you in the hospital seem like a distant memory. When I look at you now, I see a beautiful, bright little girl that is happier than I can ever imagine being. Everyone should get to witness someone and something so wonderful. Your Daddy and I are absolutely blessed to have you in our lives, and I thank God every day for the opportunity to be your Mommy.

Congratulations on hitting this wondrous six-month milestone, and the many accomplishments you have made thus far. You can already roll over both ways, sit on your own for long periods of time and play, eat at least twenty different foods, almost army-crawl, imitate Mommy and Daddy when they stick their tongues out and blow raspberries at you, and your most recent feat (my favourite so far) - using the back of your hand clapped over your mouth again and again while yelling to make the "wah-wah-wah-wah" sound, imitating Mommy and Daddy's silly tricks they perform for you.

You are brilliant, my Sprout. A bright shining star bringing love, laughter, hope, and faith to all those around you. I cannot wait to see what the next six months will bring, and watch you as you learn and grow through the summer months. There is a world of discovery out there for you - butterflies, trees, flowers, clouds, bumblebees (don't touch!), grass, frogs, and many other wonderful things. I will teach you about what I know, but I will allow you to discover and learn on your own as you begin to move around this crazy world and see it from your perspective.

I love you more than you could ever imagine. Thank you for being on this journey with me, and choosing me as your Mommy. I am so grateful that I get to share my days with such a beautiful, happy little girl. Always and forever, you will be my little Sprout. Happy half-birthday, my darling.

xoxoxo

Mommy

Pfft. Over-achiever. And yes, I'm scoffing at myself.

There is so much pressure nowadays to be a "supermom". I have definitely felt it, and I think that the societal views of motherhood have definitely shifted over the past 5-10 years. We are expected to suck it up during pregnancy, have "beautiful" photos taken of our gigantic, swollen bodies, look gorgeous after having given birth, suck it up again when times get tough after we've gone home with our babies, make time for our husbands, pretend that we're taking enough time for ourselves, look more than put-together, take classes, work, do the housework, and somehow retain a shred of our sanity. Granted, I will say that the way in which post-partum depression (PPD) is dealt with not only from a medical standpoint, but also from a societal view, is much more progressive and open than it used to be. Thank goodness for that, because I think we all go a little crazy from the pressure that we're put under.

I have always been an over-achiever. When I was little, I was very competitive. I was continually striving to have the best marks, the most friends, the cutest clothes, best toys. Thankfully, I had a very smart older sister who I always struggled to keep up with, which kept me going. In the educational aspect, being an over-achiever was a good thing. It opened many doors for me when I hit the post-secondary years, and helped me from getting too bored with my classes. With Sprout, so far, I have held my own expectations and over-achieving attitude back. I don't want to give my daughter a complex as she grows up, or ever make her feel like she's inadequate or lagging behind. I have channeled it all into my expectations for myself as a mother...which brings me to our word of the day...

CRAFTING

I'm not the most visually artistic person. I'm really good with food presentation and photography, but I can't draw more than a stick person (my stick people are cute though, I have to admit). I didn't take Home Ec. in school, and had never set my hands or feet on a sewing machine until I got one two years ago for my birthday. Even then, the only project I made was a quilt for a friend's little girl. At the time, I couldn't sew in a straight line, so it was a very crooked (but cute) little pink blanket. When Sprout was born, my mother-in-law gave me a couple of handmade hooded baby towels, which quickly became our favourite post-bath baby cuddlers because of their large, fluffy nature. The towels you can buy in the store are too damn small! We only used them for the first 6 weeks until Sprout out-sprouted them, and then we switched to the big ones. They are constructed with a regular, adult-sized bath sheet and a facecloth, and then adorned with whatever (if any) embellishments you desire on the hood or otherwise. She showed me how to make them, and after a couple frustrating attempts, I began to spit them out in under a half-hour per towel. They are an awesome, super-inexpensive baby gift, and can be totally personalized! After that, I decided that I needed some more crafty crafts to do. The next project? Soother clips.

I can't believe what they charge for those pieces of shit in the fancy baby boutiques! All they are is a piece of ribbon (less than .10 for the size), a couple of snaps (the crappy ones have velcro), and a suspender clip. For 10 or 15 freaking dollars. So I bought a couple things and made a prototype. Less than 5 minutes this time, and voila! Well...after a few very botched attempts. I don't know if it will turn into anything, but I really enjoyed making them. The over-achiever/perfectionist in me just wants to keep going and make them cuter, and more perfect.

I never thought I'd be a mom at 24 who spends her free time sewing and making crafts, or baking and cooking...but...sigh. I like it. I just have to remind myself that I am NOT a supermom, nor do I have to be. If I don't feel like going for a walk every day, so be it. If I absolutely hate going to the gym, I'm not going to do it. I'll keep doing the things that I do to keep myself probably too busy, and take the time to relax when I need to. You have to find the things in life that keep you going, and distract you from the unrelenting chaos and pressure that come along with motherhood. Be careful though...sometimes you don't need a new hobby.

Going to plot how I'll make my millions off of baby stuff, Sprout.

xoxoxo

Mommy